Hello, It has been 2 years, 2 months, and 4 days since my last confession. I wonder if some of you are still there. In my mind your RSS alert systems just came to life after years of inactivity- not unlike those tape reels in the bottom of a bunker somewhere in an ’80s movie. Silence…a red light begins to blink…a whirring sound…the tape reels spin…a Kenny Loggins song starts…
I think you get it.
So, where have I been for approximately 794 days? Nation building! As some of you know/knew I had a child. What you don’t know is that Sab and I had another child shortly after Macy was born. Her name is Rebecca. She arrived 13 months after Macy.
I have been busy trying to create the next American Women’s Tennis Champion or Greatest Tea Party Hostess (they are interchangeable at this point) and making Rebecca giggle. Its a full time job. The best job. So that’s where I have been. Moving on…
Whats changed over the last 19,056 hours since we last spoke? A few things actually…I will supply a short list. You are welcome.
- Rebecca Was Born
- SOPA Protest – Largest in History of the Internet
- A silent film won 5 Academy awards (Really?)
- “Gangnam Style” becomes the first video to reach one billion views on YouTube
- Lance Armstrong “apologizes,” loses a ba-jillion dollars, and still comes off like a douche bag
- Anonymous hacked Westboro Baptist Church (Yea!)
- Macy decided that she is a “princess”
- Rebecca likes yogurt
I am sure there were more events than those…however, I can not remember them right now.
This I will construct a more lucid post about something asap. In the mean time, I am taking requests for topics. In the comments, suggest a topic…or demand a topic. I will write about it in my usual, hard to follow, grammatically incorrect manner.
Welcome back, me!
Fark.com is…well, I will let them describe themselves.
The first thing you should know is that Fark.com isn’t a Weblog. Fark.com, the Web site, is a news aggregator and an edited social networking news site. Every day Fark receives 2,000 or so news submissions from its readership, from which we hand-pick the funny and weird notable news — and not-news — of the day.
Fark takes actual news stories and creates a witty link title and posts them on the site. I am a FAN of the people or person that comes up with these link titles. Some are as funny as you can be in 10 words or less. Here are some samples:
- Virus leaked social security numbers of unemployed, offering identity thieves chance to get turned down for credit
- Jason Giambi hits three home runs and becomes second-oldest player to hit three home runs in one game in MLB history. Best use of wood by a middle-aged man since Arnold Schwarzenegger
- Gene fights cancer, but also causes cancer. What the hell is your problem, Gene?
- Ex-IMF chief Strauss-Kahn granted $1 million bail and will be confined to home detention. No word yet on whether he will have maid service
- Carnival worker falls to his death from Ferris wheel. If you can guess how much he weighs, you win a teddy bear
- FBI recovers stolen rare Ferrari F50, kept it for an “ongoing investigation” then took it for a “short ride” and wrecked it. Now they refuse to pay for damages. Ta Da
- Fox News takes a fair and balanced look at whether freedom-loving ‘mericans should be forced to send untold billions of Freedom Dollars to mooslem ter’rist countries
- Some people write extensive resumes, and some people write this
I hope this makes your day a little better.