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An open letter to Abbott Labs

Dear Abbott Labs,

I would like to start by saying “Thank You” for making Similac Sensitive.  It is a cornerstone of my child’s meals.  She loves it and is a healthy baby girl.  Sadly, this is not the point of this letter.  The reason I am moved to write to you is there is a horrible flaw in what would be a wonderful product.  The foil liner inside the sealed lid is absolutely a pain in the tail to remove.  It appears to be glued secured welded attached under a lip that protects it’s edges.

the tab in question

I don’t know if you put that pull tab on there as a joke or if it is just poorly designed, but it is absolutely useless!  Of the many, many containers just like the one above I have opened- I have yet to pull that tab and remove the foil liner.  I understand that the foil is to protect the product and I appreciate that.  However, I have to remove it in order to use the product my child so loves and that is no easy task.  When you pull on that tab it simply rips off.  I have tried every manner of removal- from slow and steady to quick and furious.  All with the same outcome- a hole in upper left corner of the container.

After the tab is removed, I can then attempt to remove the rest of the foil that is in a semi-permanently attached state.  I am a pretty handy man.  I can use tools, navigate my way through crib assemble instructions, and unwrap the smallest of nic naks.  However, This ordeal involves razor sharp  foil that has to be manually removed piece by pains taking piece.  The removal of said razor foil is akin to -I don’t know- removing razor wire from a top of a fence while on stilts.  Needles to say this practice is not that easy when you are holding a 5 month old child that wants his bottle something fierce.

Not only is it annoying and difficult- it is dangerous.  I mentioned the razor sharp foil that you have to manually remove…well, I will just show you.

This looks like a well made pull tab...

...crap!

 

ouch

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yep, it cut me as I was trying to remove the foil, after the handy dandy pull tab had ripped free.  I never thought that could happen but, it did.

In conclusion, I would like to request that the design of that foil pull tab be re-looked at, redesigned, or done away with.  Maybe my friends at Babycenter.com can use some baby muscle about this.  It is truly a pain in the…finger.

Sincerely,

-Matt

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Some Good Advice

Apparently, everyone who has ever had a child, changed a diaper, or can spell “child” is an expert on the care of, not only their children, but YOUR CHILD as well – AND- they have permission to touch your child WHENEVER they want!!!

FYI:  This drives the wife and I insane.

Here are some scenarios that have actually happened! Read the rest of this entry

… and the results are in!

Congrats!

Dethroning”Don’t put the babies in the Microwave” spoke by “person overheard in WalMart”, This year’s BABY TIP OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to…

Babycenter.com Read the rest of this entry

Macy’s Message- Survivor: Nicaragua

Why didn’t they tell me at babycenter.com that my child would have such clearly defined opinions at such an early age?

Meet my new addiction

Macy Elizabeth Howell was born on 09/16/10 at 12:38 pm.  She weighed 6 lbs and 6 oz and was 19 inches long.

Of all the things I could say-  of all the things I have to tell you about, dear readers-  I am not going to distract you from looking at perfection.

Say “hello” to my new addiction.

.

An Upcoming Dad’s Nightmares

As “daddydom” approaches there are 2 main things that keep me up at night, haunting me like the ghosts of poopytime future.   They are so disgusting to think about that I can’t vocalize my uneasiness about them even to my wife.  There is one underlying commonality to all of them:   the baby’s “fluids”. The baby is going to leak erupt expunge distribute spread her bodily fluids in and on various things.  I know that is a definite aspect of my  future.  Like the soggy, gross sword of Damocles swinging over my head, I can do nothing but wait on its arrival.  HOWEVER, Knowing it is coming is no comfort when thinking about HOW it is going to arrive.

The thought of baby puke on my pants is not near as gut wrenching as… I dont know, maybe this:

Can you imagine that????  I threw up a little in my mouth when I saw that my nightly horror has happened to another soul…on film.   Speaking of throwing up in your mouth, that brings us to the other aspect of baby fear that I cope with.  Here is the other nightmare scenario:

The gag or dry heave is the worst autonomic reaction our bodies have.  It is a warning that our bodies send us to alert us to FOUL THINGS.  This diaper changing thing  is something that my friends at babycenter.com say will happen approximately 8-10 times a day.  That’s just the baby’s bowel movements.  I gag when my dog, a 5.5 lb Yorkie, poops on the floor.  My reaction to Macy’s diaper filling will be YouTube worthy I can only imagine.

Truthfully, I am semi-joking about the “nightmares.”  I am told that I will “get used to it.”  That, right now, does not sound like something I want to do, but something I have to do.  All joking aside, honestly, I want to learn to cope with the vile natural things that go with being a dad.  Even if they are horrendous to think about now.   These, like all things baby, will be learned as I go.

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